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"Well, it turns out he's not gay like everybody thought. He asked Darla Bede to the Winter Dance!" "That little freak? Darla, the cheerleader captain? What, he's nuts?" Mary shrugged. "Apparently, he helped Darla a whole bunch with her Shakespeare project for English Lit, and thought that entitled him to a return favor. *Of course* she turned him down, but it occurred to her that maybe he deserved some kind of break, so she promised she'd *try* to find him a date." "And this has to do with why I'm going to be late to Trig how?" "Ah, here it is." Mary handed Ham a piece of light blue paper, with the imprint of some girl's lipstick in the upper left corner. "We're doing a survey to determine what kind of girl should go with Galahad to the dance." Ham rolled his eyes. "Like that's going to help. No sane girl would ever go out with a shrimp like him when she could have a shark like me." Mary smirked. "Oh, I think this survey might do the trick." "Fine." Ham stuffed the survey in his. Being sort of nosy I decided to listen in, Tim was obviously talking to his girlfriend who attended a local Bible College. He said “No it’s not a sin, we have been dating for months now and all the girls do it” There was a pause and he said” it’s not disgusting, don’t you want to make me happy” followed by this comment, “no there’s no way you can get pregnant from sucking it”. There was a pause and Tim shouted into the phone “not until were married!!! That’s two years away I can’t wait that long, it’s just a blowjob”. Well midnight rolled around and I was finished and I invited him into my office. We sat down and had a drink and I asked him “girlfriend trouble” and he said Carol “I don’t want to dump on you but my girlfriend just a religious prude, I think it’s over. I hesitated and asked “so she won’t give you a blowjob”. Tim was startled and said “no, the problem is no one has ever given me a blowjob”. As a forty-five year old divorcee I was so horny over this conversation I could.
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