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He has his girlfriend’s name, ‘Tina’ tattooed on his pecker.”So the nurse decides to go check it out. A while later she comes out of the exam room and tells the doctor, “You were mistaken about him. He doesn’t have his girlfriend’s name tattooed on his equipment, he has his ship’s name tattooed on it. The Ticonderoga!”These are compliments of Andrew B.A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing “Love” stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them.His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes up to the balding man and asks him what he is doing.The man says: “I’m sending out one thousand Valentine cards signed: ‘Guess who?’”“But why?” asks the man.“I’m a divorce lawyer.” the man replies.You may have heard about the Southern California man who was put under 72-hour psychiatric observation when it was found he owned 100 guns. I'm tired and jus' might do sumpthin' stupid ifen I don't git some sleep." OK by me. Let's git that scratch looked at an' then hit the sack. Even if I ain't, I'll feel a whole lot smarter in the mornin'."They ate breakfast in the hotel restaurant and went to the alley to see if there were any clues about Smedly. They were about half way down the alley when a bullet buried itself in the adobe wall beside Rafe's head. They both dropped to the ground and Hank said, "Shit, that bastard was waitin' on us. One, or maybe both, of us would be dead if he wuzn't such a lousy shot." Yeah, did ya see where that there shot come from?"Hank said, "It came from over there near that there woodpile. I seen a puff of powder smoke. He must be usin' a pistol. He woulda gotten one of us ifen he'd been usin' a rifle."Rafe agreed, "Yeah, an' I wish I had my rifle right now. 'Spose I keep him pinned down while ya go git our rifles?" OK, ya got a good idee. I'll be right back." Hank left to get their rifles.
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