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And without pants, or panties, for that matter. When I tried to help them out a bit, they pushed me back onto my chair. Bethany kissed me and Sam wagged her finger in my face."No, big brother! Stay put! This is our job! Mom told us to do it. Your job is to keep us updated with any messages from Jen," Sam insisted, while Bethany handed me my phone.Just then, in fact, Jenny called as if she planned it with them. Her voice was a bit goofy, as if she were high or something. Then again, she had told me in the past that she didn't believe that pot harmed the unborn, so perhaps she was. She was also very mushy, especially when she made kissing sounds over the speaker phone."So ... you might have to clean stables? And to think that I was considering marriage to Manny! Ha! He would never have done that for me. And before you ask, no, I wasn't going to ask him for fidelity, either. For that matter, if you had ever slipped while we dated before and I caught you ... just as with him, I would. The lavish event got started at 9am and didn't finish until 2am the following morning. We sweated out the interminable tea ceremony, and Pei-Hua had to massage my back muscles during a break from all the bowing. But the sheer volume of red envelopes we collected made me feel much better about the whole thing.The banquet went on and on incessantly, and by the time my drunken relatives started singing karaoke I signaled the emcee to get this thing over with. Finally at the end I popped the champagne in an explosion that our guests would never forget.Towards the end of the marathon wedding, my joints were locked stiff after standing for so long. My muscles ached beyond belief. By the end of the night, Tina and I were barely able to stagger into my bedroom. Pei-Hua kissed my cheek and whispered a Chinese proverb of hope and luck for us, then she closed the door to give us our privacy.I'd like to say that our wedding night was a whirl of passion, scaling the heights of pleasure. But I.
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