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In our family and all places we were together, there was one rule, only one rule... this wife, equal if I'm told it's my mom, equal if I'm told by my legal dad to call her mom is nothing else but a WHORE, SLUT, BITCH, CUNT, HOOKER, and that way I was taught to call her. Nt mom, not her name, just one name like those.And while I sucked her tits as a small baby, knowing her tits, and that I knew it was before I got to school, I was told that I always be allowed, no more I was demanded to grab the way I lost her, to grab her puss, to move her pants aside and give her two or three fingers and call her names. Something I did, without really knowing what it ment to be. What I know is, that mom repelled first, being fingered by her small son, crying with me, trying to stop me, but this ended faster than she liked it. One meeting with my uncle's belt, such a happy event, when granpa, grandma, an aunt, my uncle, some guys watched this event, where I first heard this crying, this whimpering,. C'erano i soliti coglionazzi -ecoglionazze cripto-fasciste e pseudo-cattoliche- che non perdevanol'occasione di fare battutine sceme e prendermi in giro quando qualchevolta le mie movenze non ricadevano nel mainstream eterosessuale, efiniva l?. Dopo molti anni di totale asessualit? e disconnessione dal mioessere, negli anni '90 del ventesimo secolo ho fatto coming out come uomogay, come orso. Anche se come uomo non mi dispiaccio, e mi ? anchecapitato di innamorarmi di un altro uomo gay, nel profondo della miaanima in realt? sapevo che questo era un compromesso. Io non ero gay, enon lo sono. Sono una donna etero. Ecco quello che sono.Curiosamente, tuttavia, nel corso del tempo il mio diventare orso non hafatto altro che far riemergere la mia disforia di genere. Sin da moltogiovane, ero stata attratta da uomini maturi con la pancia. Da piccol*ero decisamente un* feticista di pance. In spiaggia d'estate impazzivo aguardare uomini che sarebbero potuti essere mio padre con queste.
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