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“I received similar advice from Doctor Mercer about my relationships when I was struggling. She gave Bethany similar advice. Is it safe to assume that Doctor Clauson was more worried about what you might do than what I might do?”“Yes. She knew from everything that I told her that you would make yourself available to me however I needed, including sex. But she also was fairly sure that not only would you not initiate it, but that you would be more concerned about how I felt than about getting laid. What really worried her was that I would try to use sex to get you back. I know for a fact that’s not going to work!”Her smile at the end of her reply made me feel better. The crushed look before seemed to have been caused by the vehemence of my response. I needed to apologize to her for that.“Jennifer, I’m sorry I was so harsh, but I was really upset. Please forgive me.”“I do, but honestly, I needed that. I guess I really let Jocelyn convince me that I’d been abused by you when I really. Was er inmeinen Augen getan hat, das war ein mir Ermoeglichen von Alternativen.Er hat sie damals nicht bekommen. Er scheint sehr darunter zu leiden. Undauch fuer mich waren die letzten Jahre nicht durchwegs lustig. Sie wareneinerseits entsetzlich und andereseits so schoen, dass ich oft Tagtraeumennachhing. Wenn es so laeuft wie es von meinen Eltern geplant ist, dannwerden mir in der Zukunft die 'scheusslichen Phasen' erspart bleiben. Wiees mal ist, wenn ich erwachsen bin? Keine Ahnung. Falls ich dann wirklichmal einen Durchhaenger haben sollte, dann brauche ich mich bloss anmeine Kindheit und meine erste Jugendzeit erinnern, und schon werde ichwieder ganz zufrieden sein. Wer weiss, ob mein Vater noch die Kraft habenwird zu leben, wenn ich erst mal erwachsen bin. Weniger Kraft als er werdeich jedenfalls mal nicht haben. Nicht einmal jetzt, wo sich ja wirklich meinLeben, oder welches auch immer, extremer gar nicht veraendern koennte.Aber ich vertraue einfach auf meine Eltern. Die.
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