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Get a haircut and some more mature clothing."Tommy looked down at his wrinkled tee-shirt and below-the-knee length baggy shorts. "I dress like every other teenager," he said.Catherine raised her eyebrows and said, "I think that was his point."Tommy sighed and ran his fingers through his uncombed hair. Being the rebellious youth really wasn't in his nature. It was worth a haircut and some new clothes to keep his father happy. He said, "I guess that's not too bad. At least I won't get sunburned and dehydrated, like I did in the pool." And," continued Catherine, "there's a formal party at the country club next month. He wants you to put in a good appearance there." So as I am now, I embarrass him in front of his golfing buddies. Is that it?"Catherine shook her head. "Your father is very proud of you. You make excellent grades and you stay out of trouble. He just wants me to tweak your social skills."Tommy frowned and studied his shoes for a few seconds. This wouldn't be so bad, he. "Yes... you've dealt with the sense of loss. The sense of missing someone to hold in the middle of the night. The feelings that, somehow, someway, you caused all of this to happen. You've managed to even convince yourself that love still exists, and that somewhere down the road, you'll find someone. But that isn't enough. There's still another part you haven't touched. That's your wall. That's the part you have to get through before the words in your head will make sense on the screen."To say I'm silenced by her words is an understatement. I practically ABSORB sound. I want to scream at her, that she can't understand how I feel. That there were nights that I couldn't SLEEP. That one time I found an audio file with my name on it on my computer, clicked on it, and heard her voice telling me how much she loved me, that she wished I didn't have to work so hard... and I broke down and cried. FOR TWENTY MINUTES. How I had to build a wall and keep the emotions away, until I could deal with.
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