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..Anyhow, you know how I always say it is too bad your sisterisn?t like you?" Yeah?" I said uncertain of where this was heading."Well, that?s just it. I wanted a girl just like you." heconcluded."Ok... So... That does not explain why you thought of usingthe potion on yourself..." I pointed out getting a bit moreconcerned for my friend?s well being."Well, I briefly thought that I could escape thisobligation by disappearing. I also thought I could see ifmaybe I could love you if I were a girl." You... Love... Me? So, you are gay?" I?m quite certain, now, I am not. See, I could neverimagine myself with another guy, but I sorta felt somethingfor you. I thought I could change myself into a girl, andthen, maybe, we'd find each other attractive and maybe, wecould fall in love, but truthfully, I really couldn?timagine being a girl either. I didn?t want to be a girl,really." Did you ever think that, maybe, I don't want to be a girleither?" I inquired quite disturbed by my friend's. But the relationship between us changed in subtle ways. Amanda began telling me things - things that she had kept hidden deep inside herself. These were things that I would never have guessed about her. I had always looked on her as being in control of her life - of being the self-confident type - so it shocked me when she told me how full of self-doubt she sometimes felt. After all, she was extremely attractive, highly intelligent and had always been our parent's favorite. You would think she had it made - and you would have been wrong in your conclusions."Sometimes I just feel so down on myself," she had said."I don't understand," I told her. "You've always had lots of friends. Hell, you practically had to beat the boys off with a stick." You're right," she responded. "You really DON'T understand. I've never had that many friends - not real friends. Not people I could confide in or trust implicitly. I was part of the high school elite because I've been blessed with good looks, had.
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