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“You know what I’m going to tell you don’t you?” I asked. He always told me that if I had found someone else, it would hurt him deeply.“Oh no please…” he said looking at me. I put my hand onto his and I slipped my fingers into his grip so that he could feel me close. “Who is it? Someone I know?” He was a very jealous man and I could read him like a book. As often he would plead with me never to be unfaithful to him as long as we were close friends and lovers.“You don’t know them. Infact, I’m not so sure how much I know about them myself.” His expression changed quickly as his mind began to work out what I was telling him. “Almost a stranger. Someone special, yet so mysterious at the same time.”“You let a stranger fuck you?” he asked, a look of despair on his face.“No. It’s not like that. This person is…” I suddenly wondered how he would take on the information that I was about to give him. “…Another woman.” There was a brief silence as he let go of my hand and I looked into my half. It symbolized shyness, and deep feelings of adoration that could not be spoken. In the bedroom there was thin shitty carpeting and my foot tried to draw circles, I tried to be the sweet innocent girl with the older man, but my foot kept catching on the carpet and I must have looked really foolish. He stared at me grinning for a while. Then he went up to the bed, which was a bunk bed. He didn't use the bottom, the bottom was removed for space. The lights were out. We kissed up there in the top corner of his room. It was the very first time I'd ever french kissed. It was like swimming underwater in a simmering cave. I forgot about sex, I just wanted to kiss him. I never wanted to stop kissing. At that point in my life I masturbated probably two or three times a day at minimum. Somedays I just let myself have it all afternoon. Being a latchkey k** and all. So I really only thought I wanted sex, but then I dove into his mouth and never wanted to come out. Light came in through the window.
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