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"And the pirate replied,"It was my first day with the hook."This one is compliments of LarryEver wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants over 100%. How about achieving 103%? Here's a little math that might prove helpful.What makes life 100%?If A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Zis represented as:1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26Then:K N O W L E D G E11 14 15 23 12 5 4 7 5 = 96%H A R D W O R K8 1 18 4 23 15 18 11 = 98%But,A T T I T U D E1 20 20 9 20 21 4 5 = 100%And,B U L L S H I T2 21 12 12 19 8 9 20 = 103%So, it stands to reason that knowledge and hard work will get you close, attitude will get you there, but bullshit will put you over the top.This one is compliments of IgorSix Affairs:The First Affair:A married man was having an affair with his secretary. One day, their passions overcame them and they took off for her house, where they made passionate. “Peace!” Juan said in singsong.“Bye, babe.”“Don’t have too much fun out there,” Derek said in a parental, yet joking tone. Derek left.“So, what we have on for today, Juanito?” Isa said.Juan put on a face, pondering.“I don’t know, what do you want to do?” Juan said.“We are not going this direction, Juanito,” Isa said back.Juan laughed.“All right, I guess the new horror flick?”“You know I hate scary movies!” Isa said.“I know. Haha. It’ll only be us in the theatre this early. We’d be cussing out the characters. All that shit,” Juan said, with a smile.“Only for you, Juanito. Only for you. Let me take a shower right quick,” she said.“Yeah,” Juan responded.Juan’s curiosity peaked once again once he watched his Titi sashay her hips toward the restroom. He wanted to see her again. Was he a pervert? Slightly. Was it slightly creepy that he was developing sexual feelings towards his aunt? Now that he thought about it, most likely. He waited. He changed clothes into a different shirt and a.
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