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I was successful in my attempts to sublimate my inner conflicts until I neared 30. At that point, I couldn't go on lying anymore.There was no epiphany. I didn't have a passion-inspired sexual encounter with another woman, and suddenly realize, "Oh, I'm a lesbian! Just think, after all these years..." In fact, I never had sex with another woman until well after I came out to myself. Coming out was a process that played out over several years, starting with admitting that I couldn't lie to myself any longer, and culminating in the dreaded day I had to tell Josh.In looking back, I think Josh would have been any mother's dream child. He was a boy's boy, enamored of all things connected to the outdoors and sports. His particular passion was hockey after his father started him in a five and six-year-old league. From there, passion became obsession, and he and his father had visions of him being the next Wayne Gretzky. By the time he was eight, he was involved in leagues that had him. "Your mother doesn't want you dripping cum all over the linoleum", he laughed as he left her and the boy almost shaking in fear, for her father was a solid built man.Jezebel rose up off the lounge seat, like the surfacing of a whale. She was braless and her tits wobbled and bounced. Her gym slacks had drifted down so that the crease between the cheeks of her bum was very evident as was the unruly growth of hair at her groin. She hitched them up much to the amusement of the man on the lounge. "Why hitch 'em up Jezebel", he asked. "You will only be taking them off later when everyone arrives. The last BBQ we had you were running around, naked, put a few beers down that belly of yours and there isn't a cock that is safe"."Get fucked Tom", was her smiling reply as she waddled into the kitchen to begin preparing for the BBQ of which there would be about twenty friends. She no longer worked, had lost her job because of the closure of the manufacturing factory that her mother had also.
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