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My mom moved us to a small one bedroom apartment, i hated it, at the time i couldn't understand death or where my dad was. i used to go to a near by park and sit under a apple tree that was growing near it. there where a lot of kids there but i had changed after my dad died turning inverted. not a usual trait in a nine year old i was considered a outcast and no one talked to me, though they did talk about me. there was one girl who sometimes sat with me but she was japanese and i could understand what she was saying and she couldn understand me. still, we became friends and just sat together. we'd make motions to try to understand each other and eventualy we began to learn each others language. i was finaly able to tell her my name was shaun and told my hers, ayama.my mother was always going out to the clubs and i would sneak out to the tree and sit there for hours and sing a song my dad always whistled. when i was in the 7th grade i rember walking home from school past the park and. "Oh, no, baby," he said, "Thank you." And he was gone.That was over a month ago, and the need had been building in me ever since. Now I strode down the block like a moth drawn to a flame, ignoring several young Hispanics loitering against the closed business as they whistled and made crude offers in Spanish.The wicked, debasing immorality that awaited me in Gloryville dwarfed any primitive sexual encounters these young men might have to offer. Bad as they might be, I wanted worse. I was seeking out sick, sex addicted men with nothing good in their lives. No, not the ones carrying STD's necessarily, but how would I tell the difference anyway? I wanted the ones who loved women, but were unable to convey that love with any semblance of passion or romance whatsoever. I imagined that they dreamt of women constantly; and we rejected them utterly, as pigs and degenerates, unfit for our company.Only I was different. I sought them out even though I could feel their hate as I ventured into the.
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