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I want to hate it, but I don’t.”“I didn’t know, Jen,” he said. “And I definitely didn’t mean to hurt you. I just wish you would’ve told me all of these things- how you felt.”“I didn’t even know how to tell myself,” I said, then getting a tissue to wipe my eyes. “Andy, I like being this way. I love being a woman, and it makes me happy that you accepted me so quickly.”“Of course, I did! Just because you had to transition from a guy to a girl doesn’t mean you aren’t the same person. Even if you like being a girl, you still haven’t changed all that much. You still enjoy video games, movies, porn, all of that.”I listened to what Andy was saying, and I appreciated every bit of it. Even with me trying to blame him, and the fact that I went and had sex with Skylar, he still sat right here and supported me. I got up and walked around the table to where Andy was sitting. Without saying anything, I turned and sat sideways on his lap, then wrapped my arms around him while placing my head on his. Society tries to stomp out our emotions and kill who we really are. After being changed it is worse, much worse. You see after being changed you stay who you are in your mind. Twenty something years of personal history is very hard to throw away over night. There is no magic to wearing girl's clothes, or to sex, or to hormones. Heck, ask any scientist, hormones may amplify emotions but they do not create them or control them. With time you do adapt to the change, but adaptation does not mean you love it. You keep your old mind but have to act like someone else to survive. It makes the oppression of day to day life much worse. I step off the bus onto my driveway and walk up to my house, I go inside and slip off my dress and read the paper while smoking a cheap cigar. Soon after my wife comes home. She?s uncomfortable with my body, wearing business suits and it shows. She?s in sales, and she?s a good sales person too. It?s a pity she couldn?t handle my management job. The first thing.
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