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Who are you looking for?" "Oh no," she replied with anger in her voice. "This is the apartment alright. Your letter is pure blackmail and is also absolute nonsense." She opened the large manila envelope, pulled out a letter and threw it on the table. I picked it up and started reading. It indeed told her to come to this, my apartment. She was to be the blackmailer' s sex slave for the next two Saturdays, it ordered. More instructions were to follow by e-mail. The blackmailer said he will deny being the blackmailer and she must play his game to get the negatives. "Wait a minute, lady, I don't have any negatives. This is either a joke or a mistaken identity," I informed her. "I know, I know," she said, now with a more even voice. "You said you would deny being the letter writer, so I expected you to answer the way you just did. But I know you have the negatives somewhere and I want them. I will even let you keep the prints." She reached into the manila envelope again and drew out three. Took a swig of my Orange Crush ... the best orange pop ... and tried again.I mumbled through the chips, “I want to talk to you about sex.”“What do you want to know?” Funny, he understood me perfectly. I didn’t understand what I had said, but Chuck did.Chuck was immediately coated with chips and orange soda. Passing through the nostrils at high speed, those little bitty chip fragments hurt.And they are sharp. Chuck used half a roll of toilet paper controlling the bleeding.When we resumed our decorum, I was sitting cross legged on the bed. I had a pair of red tinged and rolled toilet paper wads protruding from my nostrils ... one per side.Show and Tell had yet to begin when there was a sharp rap on the door. Chuck jumped up and looked out the peephole.“It’s the cops,” he said.Before I said, “Well ... let them in.” I took out my money book ... the little book I recorded my cash expenditures in.Chuck opened the door.“I can only assume you fellas are here about the pizza.”“Yes, Al says.
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