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The rest of my afternoon slipped by quietly, as the deadline for the upcoming advertising campaign was weeks away. While I was busy analyzing the demographics of the target market, my mind wandered back to the our conversation. So perhaps I did have a conceited attitude towards black men; I had no purpose or intentions to. Memories of being the 'uncool' girl in middle and high school led me on a path to becoming a bit of a loner and escaping the attention of horny, egotistic males. I was naïve in thinking that most of the girls in high school left virgins; in light of Facebook, I learned that I was one of the very few virgin graduates. I had drummed up my lack of sexual activity as a lack of luck and popularity; if given the chance I would have lost my virginity in high school and more than likely with a black guy rather a white guy. My mind clouded with even more suspicion and paranoia than reason. Was I just plain old scared of black men to avoid them in college? No, I reasoned,. I was wickedly pushing them into having sex with theirmale escorts.Having acknowledged defeat by Sir Benjamin and Janet I was totallysubmerging myself into the role of Britney. It was my only chance ofhappiness now. I had to push thoughts of Brett aside. He was gone. Hewas dead, I told myself.Just one more archaic ritual to undergo before the wedding. Jason hadsomehow managed to accumulate a large crowd of single bachelors for hisstag night. Officially, I didn't want to know what they were planningbut of course I made sure to find out. They were going to a strip bar toget drunk and stare at naked women. Had I been Brett, I would have donethe same thing myself, but as Britney I was furious. I told Jason thathe had better not get drunk and be in good shape for the wedding. Nohangovers and no sex allowed, I chided him.Men, the stupid fools, always assumed a woman's hen night consisted of adull dinner, a few drinks, and quiet talk about their men. In a way thiswas true but they didn't.
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