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We did not have a lot of lust to guide us. We found each other attractive, but we were so young neither of us had ever experienced clear erotic desire. The thing I badly wanted wasnt sex, but to be rid of my virginity, the last vestige of a childhood spent trusting and respecting adults, seeking their approval. Josh, I knew, was as confused about what this entailed as I was. I never brought it up. It was all we could do to get past second base. After Josh broke my heart, my great regret was not that I had lost my virginity to him, but that I hadnt. If I was going to be lovelorn, at least I would have liked the consolation of being able to brag that Id had sex. So, when I was fifteen, I started going to bars with a pack of girls who went to Catholic school in Manhattan and knew how to get fake IDs. We would go to crummy dives in the East Village to drink beer, listen to awful bands, and flirt with grown men. Once, I gave my numberor, I should say, my mothers numberto a bassist with. I have never done anything about it as I was too scared.Once, I was in a toilet at a service station, and there was a glory hole. The guy in the next cubicle was sat stroking a very impressive cock, which was very hard! He saw me watching and stood, bringing his engorged shaft towards my astonished face. Sadly his cock was so big, only the first 2 inches was able to come through the hole. I sat and stared for a moment or 2 and then took my first steps into cocksucking. I gently licked the head of this large member. I was taken aback for a moment by how velvety soft his skin seemed, but how hot and hard at the same time. Encouraged by the slight swelling as I explored, I took his cock head into my mouth. My heart was pounding and I was so turned on!!! Unfortunately his cock was just too big and he quickly withdrew. He signalled for me to put my cock through the hole but I was just too scared and fled the cubicle. That night in my hotel I masturbated with the vision of his gorgeous.
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