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His talent is simply boundless."Smithers was summoned and introduced to the new CO, who was surprised to meet a humpbacked, one eyed, toothless, hairless, scabbed and pockmarked specimen of humanity, a particularly unattractive man less than three feet tall."Smithers, old man, tell your new CO about yourself." Well, sir, I graduated with honours from Sandhurst, joined the regiment and won the Military Cross and Bar after three expeditions behind enemy lines. I've represented Great Britain in equestrian events, and won a Silver Medal in the boxing middleweight division of the Olympics. I have researched the history of..."Here the colonel interrupted, "Yes, yes, never mind that Smithers, he can find all that in your file. Tell him about the day you told the witch doctor to fuck off..."Due to the current financial situation caused by the slowdown in the economy, the Government has decided to implement a scheme to put workers of 50 years of age and above on early, mandatory retirement,. Whoa!! Sharks. Hostile action has ceased." Key West, Pretty Penny." Key West." Hostilities have ceased," David reported. "Chief ... lights on the yacht." Sanchez thoroughly examined the wreckage. "Key West ... no survivors observed. Will remain on station for the next idiot." Thank you, Pretty Penny. THETIS will be with you before daylight. Key West Coast Guard, out." Her Majesty's Nevis and St. Kitts Brig of War, Pretty Penny, out."THETIS arrived on station about false dawn."Welcome back, THETIS." Greetings, Penny. I understand you had all the fun last night. Did you leave us anything?" Just the mess, THETIS." Oh ... thanks a bunch."the commanding officer asked, "I have just one question ... were you fired on first?" Yes, Sir. Would you care to review the tape?" David said, "I'll record a copy and send over the original." The FBI would appreciate that." What do they have to do with an offshore engagement?" Our sources report a very interested congressman and a couple of local law.
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