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I stood up and greeted him. He was at least half a foot taller than me so I still had to look up to make eye contact. "Sit down. Please, I insist," he said, patting my shoulder. "What can I do for ya' Jeremiah?" I asked, a little worried since we don't normally talk unless I fuck up. "Oh nothing, really. Just wondering when you'd be having me over for dinner?" Suddenly I remembered. I'd invited Jeremiah to dinner at our last office Christmas party, but that was practically a year ago. My wife and his girlfriend at the time had hit it off pretty well. I had been kinda drunk but I distinctly remembered the invitation. "Oh... Y-yeah I remember. For sure, is your girlfriend going to join you?" "No. Mandy and I broke up a few months back," he said matter-of-factly. "Oh man, sorry to hear that." "It's no problem, Eric," he said, laughing and patting my back. "So how does eight p.m. sound? Your place." "Oh, uh... today? I mean I guess I can do that, I'll have to ask my wi..." "Cool, cool.. His thumb pressed firm on my asshole, a pivot for his fingers to tug apart my lips. Though humiliating, the shave itself wasn't unpleasant. It's been weeks since he'd so much as nicked me. But being a born sadist, one final, inevitable cruelty soon draws his rapt attention- five post-shave blasts of witch hazel fired from a spray bottle, right on my ?you know what.? God it burns terribly. Whatever's in that vile concoction, I can tell you it shouldn't come a mile from a woman's privates. A blowtorch would be merciful compared to that shit. My ?morning witching,? he calls it. The bastard.It was thankfully over quickly. For today, at least. On more leisurely mornings (or those where he's nicked me with the razor) he'll sometimes soak a washcloth in the stuff and press it painfully into my crotch, leaving the stinging astringent to fester as he readies himself for work. Or, if in a particularly cruel mood, take the razor strop and deliver, without warning, one full-strength stroke right.
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