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Perhaps they have memories too. The Druids believe so but what do they know? They are just old men who have never loved. I recall the last time I was here. The darkness had consumed me and I needed to feel closer to him. I sat here all night trying so hard to make things right again. As if I could change things by mere force of will. But why not? If everyone was invoking the Goddess and her consort tonight then I could surely conjure up someone I love. Someone I know as well as I know myself. Is our love not strong enough to hold him here? To defy the laws of nature? If you believed the Druids than nature itself can be bent to your will. The tears started flowing freely by first light for I knew I was not strong enough for such a task. Seeing and hearing things from the other world was not enough. They were just shadows of what once was, nothing of substance. I wish I could remember the voice clearly that spoke softly into my ear in that moment. I know without a doubt it was his. I saved trying on the dress until later but I did try on the shoes whichwere a bit snug and pinched my toes but I thought they went well with myblouse and skirt. From those shoes I thought my women's size was 8.5.Silly me! I soon found out that women's shoe sizing seem to be gamble,at best, and obviously I would have to try new shoes on in a store.I did buy patterned tights and a couple pairs of pantyhose although Idid notice most of the girls on campus were bare-legged, even in coldweather, but my male side remembered how stockings flattered a femaleleg. Having to coordinate my clothes was going to be a whole otherlesson.On my way home I had picked up some Thai take-out since I had nocookware or food. I slowly ate my dinner, careful not to spill any foodon my new things, and just thought about what had transpired in my lastfew weeks.Until my run-in with Duane I was having a hard time deciding what Ishould do. What he did to me was despicable but I knew now that I wantedno part in.
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