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"So, on the way home the 80-year-old stopped at the bakery.As he was looking around, the saleslady asked if he needed any help.He said, "Do you have any rye bread?" Yes, there's a whole shelf of it. Would you like some?"He said, "I want 5 loaves."She said, "My goodness, 5 loaves! By the time you get to the 3rd loaf, it'll be hard."He replied, "I can't believe everybody knows about this shit but me."Selling BiblesA pastor concluded that his church was getting into very serious financial troubles. While checking the church storeroom, he discovered several cartons of new bibles that had never been opened and distributed.So at his Sunday sermon, he asked for three volunteers from the congregation who would be willing to sell the bibles door-to-door for $10 each to raise the desperately needed money for the church.Jack, Paul and Louie all raised their hands to volunteer for the task.The minister knew that Jack and Paul earned their living as salesmen and were likely capable of selling some. His heart started to thump. What if Ted didn't go for it? What then? Jack was so sure his plan would work, that he never got around to explaining Plan B to Gimel.The phone came to life with a tinny sounding ring. Gimel popped up and grabbed the phone."Yeah?" Please alter our plans. Instead, take the envelopes to the location on the paper I gave you. Make sure you personally witness their placement in the lock box and the lock box returned to its secure location."Gimel smiled. "No problem, Amigo. Congrats on the win."Jack chuckled. "Thanks, my friend. Your assistance has been priceless."Nearly three-quarters of an hour had passed, and still the office door remained closed. Allison sat at the dining room table with her mother and brothers. No words were spoken, and no one had attempted to leave, all frozen by Ted's command that they remain at the table. Allison's tears had dried up long ago. Her breathing and heart rate had come back to tolerable levels. She occasionally attempted to.
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