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At first my stomach did flips, I could not believe that I had so carelessly exposed myself to my son like that. Then while laying down next to my passed out hubby in my sheer nightie it also dawned on me that little Ricky was the only person to have shown any interest in what I had hidden in years really. I really did not sleep well that night at all, just too many emotions but I do have a clear memory of what emotion won out. Anger at my husband for becoming a drunk, anger at being ignored, frustration, the sexual kind, anger at my husband for being the kind of drunk that has to be hauled off to bed by his 14 year old son. I think that this was the point more instinctive then anything at that point where I decided that if my husband wanted the bottle more than me and my son wanted to look. My quiet revenge would be to let him look.The next night and every night after my husband repeated that ritual, the only change was the weekends when he was off. Then he just drank more.The next. .. so tell me about yourself?" I asked."Well, I am Helen and I'm an attorney-at-law for a large firm of solicitors up in Lincolnshire. I'm married and have two children a boy and a girl who are at university." So why?..." I asked."I was eighteen and a boy I was going out with accidentally got me pregnant. He didn't want to know and whilst my parents initially pushed for an abortion, by the time I'd gotten around to telling them we realised it was too late. So I ended up putting you up for adoption, went to university and studied law, met Bill, my future husband, and we started a family. Yet I still thought of you, but knew that you were living in a loving home with good people and didn't think you needed me in your life. I doubt your Mum and Dad would have been any too happy, so it seemed best to keep my distance till now, when you could decide for yourself. Circumstances have changed in my life. I now have more time to myself and hoped you'd at least like to get to know me now. Not.
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