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And as embarrassing as it was, I started crying into his chest. I couldn’t stop it even though I didn’t want my mom to see me do something so childish just seconds after we were talking.Losing myself in the dark world pressing into Ean’s chest, I felt mom squeeze my arm for a few seconds shortly before I heard the door quietly shut.I cried and cried and cried wishing with everything that I could just fall asleep. But I wasn’t tired. My body laid awake next to Ean’s sleeping form for hours in tears.As I hugged him for so long and so hard, eventually, I noticed something moving between us. I couldn’t believe what I was feeling. Ean was getting hard in his sleep. I repositioned myself to let it pop into a more comfortable position. If there was one thing in the world Ean would always be prepared for in any imaginable situation, it apparently had to be sex.I laid with him about half hour longer thinking about that before I felt a deep breath of air blow into me. Ean was waking up. There. I told him about starting over, about trying to make a positive difference in families, of turning my life around. I was no longer chasing fame and riches. I wanted to make amends to the world for the evil I did to him. That’s the right word, evil.’ ‘It was another three months until I felt that I was healed enough to come back home, even then I chose to sleep in the den for the next 5 months after that.’ ‘One of the first things that Curt did for me when he came back home was to take me to see his family. I was frightened, but with me present, he told them outright that I was to be brought back into the fold. He would not tolerate me being excluded, talked about behind our backs, snubbed or dismissed in any way. If anything like that happened, he would be giving whoever did it hell. He never had to admonish anyone. With some initial misgivings, I ws back within the family.’ ‘I still was not completely sure of Gene. Unfaithfulness is so damaging. But we continued to see the therapist.
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