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I thanked him for his suggestions and made the font change. I didn't even mind the implied criticism.I posted the story, it was a little out of place because the site specializes in erotica, but they allowed about anything legal to be posted.It was up for less than eight hours and I started getting emails. Most were complimentary but several with some sincere criticism. I went back and did a thorough spell and punctuation check, and fixed some run on sentences, also paragraphs were too long. One person pointed out that I was being unrealistic on how long I was having my character hit a golf ball, the story was a fantasy but hey he was right about it being unrealistic, and he had brought it up politely so no reason not to make a change. After making those corrections I reposted the story awaiting further comments and hoping for a few compliments.There were some attaboys and requests to keep writing, but another reader pointed out that my story would go better if it was a girl. She still spent a great deal of time (and every night) with Igwanda, but she now was also focused on such things as designing a dress and otherwise making wedding plans."I've decided I'd like to do it here, Carlos," she told him. "If we did it on the ship everybody could be there, and that would be nice, but it would leave them"—she gestured—"out. If we do it here, we can have most of the ship. Provided that you can relax your limitation a little for that, can you?"He rolled his eyes. "I suppose," he said. "John said we need to show them the same trust they have us, and that will be a way to do it. There is a time for caution, but it can be overdone. Yes, you may have your wedding party."She squeezed his hand. "And we can invite them, too," she continued. "I've been talking to them about the different kinds of social glue we use, and certainly ceremonies are one of those things, and I think it would be really useful if they could actually see one. I'm going to tell them about.
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