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Sam could see the muscles in Lynn’s face tighten. ‘Oh my,’ she silently observed, ‘the claws are out!’ ‘Oh my! At last I meet the notorious Alexis!’ Lynn said, and then he laughed. ‘I have so much to thank you for — after all, if you hadn’t betrayed my Sam and broken her heart, she and I might never have met. And Sam is so loyal that if we had met anyway, we would have never ended up together. She would have never stabbed YOU in the back. But it was all to my good fortune, because Sam and I are soul mates. And we have two lovely children together as well. Not to sound like a cliché or anything, but we are the proverbial ‘one big happy family’!’ Alexis began to stutter, ‘But, but, but… Sam is a lesbian!’ ‘I guess it all evened out — I was gay too,’ Lynn shot back with a little shrug of his shoulders. Sam was laughing at this point, just seeing the look of confusion and frustration on Alexis’ face. ‘How? I mean…’ Alexis stammered. Sam decided to step in. ‘Alexis, I guess that Lynn and. "I went out to milk the cows the other day, and there was a Hollywood producer huddled in the barn," said Southern Manitoba farmer Red Greenfield, whose acreage borders North Dakota. "The producer was cold, exhausted and hungry. He asked me if I could spare a latte and some free-range chicken. When I said I didn't have any, he left before I even got a chance to show him my screenplay, eh?"In an effort to stop the illegal aliens, Greenfield erected higher fences, but the liberals scaled them. He then installed loudspeakers that blared Rush Limbaugh across the fields, but they just keep coming.Officials are particularly concerned about smugglers who meet liberals near the Canadian border, pack them into electric cars and drive them across the border where they are simply left to fend for themselves after the battery dies."A lot of these people are not prepared for our rugged conditions," an Ontario border patrolman said. "I found one carload without a single bottle of Perrier drinking.
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