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A moment later he responds with “trust me.” Short, sweet, and no room for refusal. “I'll be there soon,” I typed in and sent as I started my car, beginning the drive to his house.The drive is not long, but with 7 AM traffic on Saturday, it is long enough that I have time to think about what my Master may be up to. I really have no clue. Knowing his sadistic side, he might just want to make me suffer this morning. Knowing his romantic side, maybe he wants to tuck me in and let me sleep in his warm bed. I've been his for a few years now, and I still have no idea how he thinks—but he has trained me to trust and obey him, and I will.Between the traffic, the drowsiness, and my mind wandering to thoughts of my Master and what was going to happen to me, I was soon pulling into his drive way. Time really does fly away sometimes, so I sat in my car for a moment, prolonging the inevitable to gather my strength and my thoughts. When I felt ready, or ready enough, I got out and walked up to the. I had never known such deep unhappiness as I felt now. I felt I had lost everything and each time I thought about what I had done for Bill that I hadn't done for John, I'd die a little inside. I knew that even with the help of the doctor, I would have a very difficult time surviving if and when John totally cut me loose. I imagined that the time for that was very near to hand too. If I could have, I'd have spilled all to his mom in hopes that she would be able to help me to come up with something... anything to fix things. I had known her only briefly, but she accepted me into her life without reservation. When she died I had felt like my own mother had died as well. She had been one of those kind, caring and loving people.I imagine that if John's mom had still been alive, I may have thought differently about things and never cheated on him either. Well, I was telling myself that. When he told me about his father and why he wasn't in John's life anymore, I'd felt the loss and pain of.
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