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"PINOCCHIO had a human girlfriend who would sometimes complain about splinters when they were having sex. Pinocchio, therefore, went to visit Gepetto to see if he could help. Gepetto suggested he try a little sandpaper wherever indicated and Pinocchio skipped away enlightened.A couple weeks later, Gepetto saw Pinocchio bouncing happily through town and asked him, "How's the girlfriend?" Pinocchio replied, "Who needs a girlfriend?"LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD was walking through the woods when suddenly the Big Bad Wolf jumped out from behind a tree and, holding a sword to her throat, said, "Red, I'm going to screw your brains out!" To that, Little Red Riding Hood calmly reached into her picnic basket and pulled out a... 44 magnum and pointed it at him and said, "No, you're not. You're going to eat me, just like it says in the book."MICKEY MOUSE and MINNIE MOUSE were in divorce court and the judge said to Mickey,"You say here that your wife is crazy." Mickey replied, "I didn't say she was. ”“I know.” She giggled, in between hard cat-licks of his erect nipple. “He’s been trying to get strip-clubs closed down in his constituency.”“Can’t afford any scandals in his own family then, can he? Not involving his precious daughter.” His fingers curled tight into her hair as she nuzzled him.“That’s right. Mummy Greendale could never show her face at a charity function again.” She turned her face up and their eyes met.“Helen,” he said with smiling approval, “you’re quite the twisted little bitch aren’t you?”She returned the smile hazily, drunk on Machiavellian scheming and sex and him. “I’ll get her for you, Gavin. Now fuck me. Pound the shit out of me. Fuck me like you’re going to fuck her.”He did, putting her over the side of the bed without further bidding and slamming his demanding length deep back inside. Her hands clawed the bedspread in a fraught ecstasy as he took her and wickedness flickered on her face between the hard moments of connection.“I’ll do it for us, Gavin, for.
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