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They argued about nothing. They argued when they woke up, during the day, and before going to bed. The circumstance that started the argument might differ but after arguing for only a few minutes, the heated dialogue reverted to the standard argument, an argument that neither Big Ralphie nor Connie ever won. Whenever Big Ralphie left slamming the door behind him or when Connie resorted to hiding herself in her comatose state, they put the argument on hold until they could return to it that night or the next morning. Little Ralphie memorized every word. He mimicked them, moving his lips without sound, as he lay in his bed listening with the covers pulled over his head to their inane and never ending argument. ‘You’re never in the mood.’ ‘You’re never here.’ ‘I’m here, now.’ ‘I’m not in the mood.’ ‘See.’ ‘See what?’ She looked at him with a face full of hurt and contempt. ‘I’d be in the mood if you gave me the money that you give to your whore girlfriends.’ ‘I couldn’t give you enough. “Sounds like we’re both entrepreneurs,” she said laughing.“I guess,” I replied.“I found your company’s website,” he said. “I just sent you an email, please reply to it.”I opened Outlook on my computer and saw an email from . I opened it. The message contained the phrase, “Yo.”I hit reply, typed in the phrase “Yo,” and hit send.A second later the voice on the other end said, “Looks like you’re who you say you are. I’m going to text you pics of all our girls then try to get a hold of Elsa.”“Great,” I said.“If she’s not available I highly recommend Brittany Sunshine. She looks like Brittany Spears, but Brittany Spears in her prime, not Brittany Spears of today.”“I’ll keep that in mind,” I replied.“Cool,” he said. “Text me back after you get the pics and let me know if we can get something going. And please note all of our models are eighteen and over.”“I will,” I said.“Cool,” he said. “Sending as soon as I hang-up.”“Thank you,” I replied right before he disconnected.Seconds later the.
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