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It helped. It was a great run, with lots of parties and lots of fun and lots of lovers and lots of sex. And I still want to have parties and fun and sex, but I don't want to be running anymore. Or maybe it's better to say that I don't need to run anymore. I ran out of fear, Moira. I ran because I'd made the life I had with Lisa and Paul into the perfect domestic scene, at least in my head. And if I never again was settled down as a husband with a perfect wife and child and home, then it could never be taken away again, right?"But over the last few months, I've slowly come to realize that running away couldn't protect me — that my ship and my fun and my 'girls' — and most, most especially you, Moira, were as important to me as Lisa and Paul ever had been. As Joanne left, and then Kate left, it hurt more than I allowed myself to show. And yes, Moira, if I'd tried to have this conversation with you a couple of weeks ago, you'd have been right in thinking that I was just afraid to lose. They looked to be about 10 or 11 years old. Very pretty but sadly wearing shoes. They saw us all barefoot and asked mom if they could go barefoot? Mom looked at us a bit strangely but refused to allow her daughters to go barefoot. I extended my hand to her and introduced myself. She said her name was Mary as she took my hand and shook it. She asked why we were all barefoot. I said, well the best answer I can give you is to take off your shoes and see for yourself! She laughed at that. I said seriously, its a wonderful feeling! Well, I dont know. Please mom! Her kids cried. She gave in that time and they excitedly took off their shoes and socks. Ahh, more beautiful barefoot girls! I would love to have stayed longer, but I wanted to get the kids moving. I knew we only had a certain amount of time before I had to have them home and I wanted to get in another lesson for them. Enjoy girls! I winked at the mother and then excused us. Her girls were giggling as they watched us go. It was.
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