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That seems to be the best way for us to reach him at this time." Jesus, it looks like we can't get the US Army to help us in staving off the attacks on our produce wagons. My last request for help was turned down, with a side note to stop asking, because the US Army is too busy elsewhere to help against local bandits. Either they don't understand or they don't want to understand."Sam, how many men do we now have available for work on guarding the produce wagons?" We've got 22 men we normally assign to that duty. There are others we can use on a temporary basis, depending on other work assignments. I would say that, normally, we have about 34 or 35 available if I have two days notice."We were so successful the last time we tried it, let's try again to ambush the ambushers. We can use the same basic plan we used the last time. We can just adjust the number of men assigned to each segment. It seems to me that three wagons with four riflemen per wagon worked well, but we need more. "I looked into his eyes, asked if he had a Milky Way, then, "Are you a doctor?" No, little muff diver, I'm Beauregard Hamhock... (mmmmmm hamhock.) I run a mobile enema service called, 'Tear you a New A-hole.' Business has been kinda slow since our latest name change, but back to your problems, little carpet muncher. All you have to do is suck the hipster toxins out of her, and she's good as new. She might need an enema, but I can bill you for that later." I have to suck toxins from that ghastly thing?"He continued, "I wouldn't call her ghastly. She's quite attractive, actually, for a pussy gobbler."I saw red! "Listen, you homophobic quack, I meant suck toxins from her wound?"His response, "Oh that. No for the purpose of plot development, you can suck it from any orifice (cue dramatic music).That was, finally, all I needed to know. Throwing my slender lover over my shoulder like Richard Kiel in "Eegah," I carried her back to our room with Hamhock following closely, enema bag in hand..
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