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I had never had sex like it in mylife. My head went from side to side I kept saying “ohgod, oh god, oh god”. “You fucking love it don’t you? You love a big fatblack cock fucking your posh white cunt,” he snarled.Normally I don’t like swearing but this just turned meon more. Before I knew it he was grunting and I felthim cum deep inside me. That pushed me over into onefinal orgasm.He pulled out, laughing. I just lay on the table,gasping like a landed fish. “You’re one fine fuck, lady. What’s your name?”“Corrie,” I replied. “If ever you want a good fucking again, Corrie, ringme.”He wrote his number on a piece of paper and put it inmy bag, then he left. When I finally recovered my wits,I made myself decent and drove home. In the bath, Ivowed never to ring him. Two days later, I dug the scrap of paper out of thebin. Shaking, I dialled. A deep voice answered.“Paul, its Corrie.”“Come round. Are you doing anything?” I quickly replied “Nope, I’m free!” “Great” she said. “Can you watch my dog?”I’m seriously thinking about re-marrying my ex-wife ... but I’m pretty sure she’ll figure out I’m just after my money.A 13 year old weasel walks into a bar and approaches the counter. The bartender immediately notices the underage weasel. “Sir, you look extremely young. I can’t serve you even a single beer”. “Oh c’mon. You can’t just slide me one?” “Can’t and will not serve to anyone under age”. “Fine. Well what other things do you have?” “Well for non-alcoholic drinks I have tap water and bottled water, I have coffee, and I have pop. Which would you like?” “Pop” goes the weasel.Three desperately ill men met with their doctor one day to discuss their options. There was an alcoholic, one was a chain-smoker, and one was a homosexual.The doctor, addressing all three of them, said “If any of you indulge in your vices one more time, you will surely die”.The men left the doctor’s office;.
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