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I don’t call you Red because of your long red hair.” Mom paused, debating whether to share a huge secret or not. She chose to share just enough. “It’s about time you knew. Your dad, expecting a boy, named you Redmond before I woke after giving birth. I hated it, so I just called you Red for short. Is that better?”Red’s shoulders drooped as did her chin. “That’s one reason he’s not here any longer. Now scoot! Get to his mama’s house. You will spend the night there. She has an extra special gift for you this year and our usual holiday gift to cover our mortgage. We need that cash. Go get it before the old ... umm, dear forgets that she wants to make up for her son’s stupidity. Go before it really gets dark. Make sure you wear your hunter orange cape so those woodland pot heads don’t shoot you.”There was so much more she wanted to tell her virgin daughter, but she knew Red had to learn the profound facts firsthand. Like how special her dad and grand parents are. Like the real reason she. I didn't really care since most of those who'd seen him had also seen him play.Gloria adored Giovanni."John, you simply must tell me what employment agency you use!" She sipped her drink and actually pawed the man. "It's just not fair that all the tasty ones work for you." What can I say?" I gloated. "I must be living right." You must be. This has been quite the year for you. Have they offered you the big desk at the Commission yet, or did you frighten them away?" They called. I told them to go suck eggs." I agreed to an interview in January."You are such a cad!" She waved past my shoulder. "Oh look; it's that ghastly little slut Bachman. How she keeps her seat in the House I'll never know." Slut?" Oh my God, yes! She's been drilled more often than a Texas oil rig. And that fairy she passes off as a husband - no offence, dear - he's just as bad." Fairy?" I smirked at her."Now John, I'd never say that about you. You sleep with men. You don't hid it, you're not ashamed of it, and you.
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