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Eyes and ears useless, I try for other senses to keep touch with this reality. The scents that fill the room are simple; candle wax, a breath of perfume (mine? I can't tell), the detergent that was used on the sheets beneath me. The only taste in my mouth is of the light metallic tang of the water I was given, but I can't remember how long ago that was, only that it was welcome as it ran past my lips, soothing my aching throat. And I can feel only the silk of the restraints around my wrist, like the caress of my lover, sharp only if I resist their gentle hold; the warmth of the cotton sheet beneath my body, smooth and easy; the warm air from the furnace vent, drying the beads of sweat that dapple my body. I strain to hear his steps, so that I can prepare for what I know is to come, wanting to pull my bound feet up, my knees further beneath me, but not able to move more than a few inches in any direction. I am tied, face down, spread wide, waiting... always waiting... and. Let's face, he's flat assed boring.I have also come to the realization that I know when and also why Mike and I have drifted apart. I have been so stupid and callous to my own husband. My affair with Sean is the sole reason for the fact that my marriage is on the rocks. Actually, I am the sole reason that my marriage is on the rocks. I can look back and see that I shut him out. I have given to another man that which I promised under oath to God to give only and forever to my husband. I look in the mirror and wonder just who in the hell is that woman that I'm putting make-up on each morning. I don't even recognize my own face and I don't like what I see. Actually, I hate what I see.If and when my husband comes back home, I am going to do my very best to make it up to him. I'm going to show him that I'm the best thing that every happened to him. I'm going to love him and make love to him as often as he'll let me. The only question is when is he coming home and how and when do I get rid.
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