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She switched on the light. "Jimmy, what's all the squeaking and stuff going on in here. I can't sleep." Mandy, wow. Okay, I guess you're old enough to know about sex, right?"She blushed a bright red, almost as red as her hair. Then she started to cry."Mandy, what's wrong? Mandy, talk to me. What's the problem? I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bring up sex." No, Jimmy, it's not that. Oh, hell, you don't understand. I've never had sex with anyone else. I'm still a virgin!"I almost laughed but was smart enough to hold it back. Then I gave her the true story of her room mate James."Listen girl, you should know something. I was a virgin myself until two years ago. I know, it sounds strange, but it's true. I was a twenty-five year old virgin. You're fine Mandy. You've got plenty of time." Are you kidding Jimmy? You were in the Navy. You've been to college. How could you be a virgin that long?" It's really simple, Mandy. If a girl said no, I backed off. That happened a lot and I just never. “Something for your mother? Well, that’s very thoughtful of you,’’ smiled Santa. “What do you want me to bring her?”Without blinking she replied, “A son-in-law!”One day, shortly after the bir... One day, shortly after the birth of their new baby, the mother had to go out to run some errands.The proud papa stayed home to watch his wonderful new son.Soon after the mother left, the baby started to cry.The father did everything he could think of doing, but the baby wouldn’t stop crying.Finally, the dad got so worried that he decided to take the infant to the doctor.After the doctor listened to the father relate all that he had done to get the baby to stop crying, the doctor began to examine the baby’s ears, chest and then down to the diaper area.When he undid the diaper, he found that the diaper was indeed full.“Here’s the problem”, the Dr. said, “He needs to be changed!”The father was very perplexed, “But the diaper package says it is good for up to 10 lbs.!”The Bronze StatuesA tourist.
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